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MOMENT OR MOMENTARY

I'm back in my bed. Twisting and turning, trying to find a perfect fit for myself to fall asleep. I put my hand under my head while lying flat on my back. I've become a bit resilient to close my eyes as I start seeing things that I would never get to see with my eyes open although I want to so desperately. So, instead of closing my eyes I stare into nothingness. I stare at my roof and in a moment start to go high and beyond that.  It has been quite a long time since I have been losing control. The nights have something to do with that as I have always hated my days particularly before today. It had been a rather energetic day despite of the fact that it had been days since I had slept peacefully. What makes it even more intriguing is the fact that none of it felt like I had to put in any kind of efforts. It just happened, came and went past like life usually does, in a flash. I cannot fathom how many times we walk past all the possibilities that were once our deepes
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THE CITY OF COINCIDENCE.

  How weirdly satisfying are the first rains in this city. If you didn’t notice then let me bring it to your attention that the earlier sentence was not a question. I’ve always been very fond of rains and what it does to the environment. I wish there was something similar that could have the same effects and result on us human beings. It hasn’t been the kind of story where you wished for something and life and fate put their magic to manifest that and make it happen miraculously. But when things reach a threshold, there’s always something new waiting to sprout to life.   It was just like any other day that I could reckon. It was supposed to be an emotional rollercoaster but of-course not for me. I had just gotten out of the college gate and was waiting for the only friend I had throughout the course of time I had been a student of the college and let’s not get into how much of a task that was. Oh, and yes, it was the last day for us as a student of that institute. It has always been a

INSOMNIAC

I had this thought the other night. That's how it starts, isn't it? With a thought and before you know it, you're deep inside a world that makes no sense but in the retrospect defines you. In a similar pattern like every other night, I put my phone aside in a futile attempt to put my brain to rest and go to sleep. I've ran out of ways to knock myself out. Somedays I call myself a selenophile just to stay relevant and sane to myself and my thoughts. What I fail to realize is it's just another fancy word to fool myself the way drugs fool the nervous system.  Since I couldn't bring myself to gather the patience for a good long sleep or maybe I had simply lost hopes, I sprung into thinking how I had nothing to think about and how everything that has ever existed is pointless. Come to think of it, it's quite an ambiguous thought but I'd rather blame every sleepless night for making me so naive to think about it. I clench the surprisingly hard pillow as I begi

LEARN IN THE DARK.

Be true to yourself. You cannot be truly satisfied with what energy you receive until and unless you are true to yourself to begin with. If you are angry, say it. If you are sad, say it. If you are disappointed, say it. Try to channel thoughts into simple words. And this isn't just restricted to negative emotions. This applies to everything that you feel or think. The longer you hold it inside, the more piled up it is gonna be. If you don't find someone to say anything to, see that's where the social network becomes useful. They aren't there for pretending to have a good life. Nor are they meant to influence your mind with what posts you see. Those posts don't define your life, you do. You cannot be true to the ones you love if you cannot be true to yourself. Moreover the first person whom you should love is yourself. Make yourself a priority. You won't be able to hold a grudge or hug anyone or abuse someone or love someone if you are not up and about. Take care

HIDE AND SEEK IT.

Sometimes the problem is that you look at it as a problem. We, a normal person with a truckload of "problems", choose to perceive things the way it would hurt us rather than help us because believe it or not, it gets us attention. It isn't necessary as to what extent is your problem troublesome. Even the smallest of things such as you not being able to watch your favorite game is troublesome. We as humans entitle ourselves to getting attention but won't pay the same to others when its time to reciprocate. Right from the time we started to realize what stress is, we have been nurtured to either suppress it or use it to get attention. Never have I ever seen people actually dealing with it. Now this might just be one of the many aspects of stress relief. It is soothing to know that something as petty as just getting attention can help go through so much. It elevates the possibility of a person to bust out of his own mind caged by toxicity or thoughts provoking what might

UNBELIEVABLE! OR IS IT?

In between the moments where things happen, where we learn and grow, there are a million other moments which are breathtaking. Moments where it is just as you dreamt of, which are way beautiful than you imagined them to be, where the sky is lit, the perfect songs play randomly on shuffle and all you have to do is breathe. If you realize how beautiful a feeling this is you have already reached a point where everything and nothing matters to you at the same time. You take an effort to make others realize this feeling and care even less for someone or something who keep denying whatever you are trying to convey. Life is more about doing random things without the fear of missing out, making mistakes, learning and unlearning from them, getting angry, trying to not get angry the next time and growing a little each day in the process. Sometimes growth can be very small, so small that it seems negligible or absent. The truth happens to be that it never is nothing, it is always something.  Hypo

PULL THE CURTAINS

A little experiment, although won’t help much through the lockdown where you have all the time in the world, but sure is interesting. All of us have plastic bottles at home which we were supposed to dispose of after use. Nonetheless, crush one of those bottles and throw it hard at something. Now pick it back up and do whatever the hell you can to make it go back to exactly the way it was before. Apologize, cry, pull it and put pressure on it or whatever is in your capabilities. Does it go back to being exactly the way it was before? This is one of the very classic examples. It is the same thing happening with almost everyone. Even the slightest of things are leaving a whole lot of marks on the minds and consciences of people, especially those in the teenage and 20s. And then on the other side of the world are the victims of rape and sexual abuse. Now, imagine the plight of a person in the age group mentioned earlier who is also a victim.  One of the very lesser known things in India is